The Death of a Parent

“He’s been well trained”

These words were heard being spoken during an interview on the BBC that was discussing King Charles III, and the death of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II. Then, some thoughts arose whilst watching the arrival of the motorcade bringing the Queen’s coffin to the Palace of Holyroodhouse

I found it moving to watch, thinking to myself, how must it truly feel to be the eldest child of the Royal family (with all the emotions that must be connected with that ‘position’) and not being ‘allowed’ (that word has been selected, as the feeling associated with it may well be triggered) to be at Holyroodhouse, because of his formal duties, as the new King and head of state. And please let me say now, I am not in the slightest wishing to come across as critical.

I am simply wishing to encourage discussion on what will trigger an array of emotions and explain in this short post that, when the lady said “He’s been well trained”, I personally, don’t know how someone can ever be “well trained” for a situation connected with the death of their mother (or any person who they have a unique relationship with).  I don’t believe it is natural or healthy to ‘train’/‘condition’ a person (especially when a child) to suppress emotions. It is my personal belief (supported by some neuroscience research) that if a person has to do that with their emotions, then the ‘pressure’ that builds up inside them becomes so great that without an ‘outlet’, it will show itselfs by disrupting their mental or physical health.

As we enter a historic week leading up to the funeral of the Queen, I can’t help but hope that some attention is brought to this topic by the media so that a new ‘training programme’ can be put in place, to enable the Queen’s family (from her children to Great Grand children) to be far more open and free with their emotions, especially in public. Perhaps the life and death of the Queen can continue to be a catalyst for change? I truly hope so. ❤️🙏    

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